


Rest for the Weary

by amerande



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Genre: non-sexual relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-29
Updated: 2016-06-29
Packaged: 2018-07-18 22:54:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 843
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7333969
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amerande/pseuds/amerande
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A closer perspective of two of the days of Episode IV: A New Hope and Ben Kenobi's actions in them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Rest for the Weary

He is tired; achingly, endlessly tired. The night finds him hidden in the dark of his hovel, massaging swollen joints and waiting for wisdom and peace. Prescient dreams have been visiting him more and more. He knows better than to try to interpret them precisely; it is enough to know that _something_ is coming. Now he only wishes they would let him sleep.   
  
_For Luke, it is worth it._ The little boy he’d watched from afar was grown, and Ben feels in his bones that the gears of the universe were moving again, grinding forward towards a resolution. If he falters, now...

“You’ll guide him well, Obi-Wan.”   
  
He looks around until he sees Qui-Gon's shimmering presence, an echo in the Force, standing in the darkness.   
  
“Will I?”

“You’ll give him a direction and purpose. The rest is up to him.”

It’s hardly reassuring, but Ben knows better than to wish for any other reassurances.    
  
Moments trickle by, silent except for the howl of the wind outside. Ben returns his attention to soothing his stiff joints. It's been years since he stood on ceremony with Qui-Gon.   
  
At length, Qui-Gon stirs and moves to sit beside him.   
  
“You’ll have to make a choice tomorrow.” Qui-Gon says it with no inflection. His voice is so even, so carefully neutral.   
  
“So soon?” Ben asks, but it’s without conviction. He’d thought he might have more time with the boy, but more time won’t make him any more sure. And he’s so _tired_.   
  
“I’ll be with you,” Qui-Gon says.   
  
“As you always have been, my old friend.”    
  
Qui-Gon says nothing, and Ben wonders when he started thinking of the man exclusively as friend instead of master.   
  
He's been talking with the echo of his master since just a few months after he brought Luke to Tatooine. The older Jedi had revealed himself one night as Ben meditated, and he'd been Ben’s one real companion since then. Whole months would pass between his visits - once, he was gone for nearly two years - but Ben often fancied that he managed to linger, a presence in his own mind much like the bond they'd shared during his days as a Padawan.   
  
How long ago had that been?   
  
"My old friend," he repeats slowly.   
  
Qui-Gon moves again, standing out of the way as Ben lies down to meditate and sleep.   


* * *

* * *

  
He can fight now, if he chooses - keep the duel going until his old bones break or the Stormtroopers interfere. He can run; Luke and the others are nearly free and they could surely all make it. Or he can stay, can transcend, can place himself in the perfect position to mentor Luke and guide him through what must be done.   
  
It _is_ a choice, as Qui-Gon had said, but it's one he made years ago when he left Bail Organa with Leia and took Luke to Tatooine.   
  
He's so _tired._   
  
He senses Luke nearby - and he could almost smile, Leia too - and everything crystallizes. Time stops in a heartbeat.   
  
Darth Vader there before him - Anakin, who he loves and who he has failed so, so utterly. Anakin, who was a brother to him, who gave _him_ purpose when he might have been lost forever to sorrow. Who has shared so much of his life, so many of his joys and tribulations. Anakin, who is going to kill him.   
  
Luke and Leia behind him, with the others. He glances toward the twins. Such promise, such burden - all the hope of the galaxy. Luke, who he has tried so hard to serve and protect in all the ways he couldn't protect the boy's father. Leia, who has inherited all the best parts of her mothers and fathers both. The Skywalker children, with all the wonder and horror that implies. For a moment, a multitude inhabits the space where the twins stand, and he cannot see them, only thousands of Jedi standing in them, behind them, around them, binding them and supporting them.   
  
And all around him like an embrace, like the breath of a whisper in his mind - Qui-Gon, who has seen his every moment of weakness, who has comforted him through every despair. Qui-Gon, who brought sense to his dreams and kept the seed of hope in his heart alive when the desert might have killed it utterly.   
  
It seems as if a golden band pierces through him, connecting him to father and children, stretches from his failures to his brightest hopes.   
  
For one awful moment, his heart is so _full_ , so brimming with the love that has borne him through all these impossible years, that he knows it will break.   
  
_I'm so tired, Qui-Gon._   
  
_You will rest._   
  
Time resumes, and he raises his lightsaber before him, looks full into Darth Vader's mask like he might see past it and into the eyes of the boy who loved him, too.   
  
He closes his eyes.   
  
There is emotion, and there is peace.   
  
There is passion, and there is serenity.   
  
There is death.   
  
And there is Qui-Gon, cradling him in the heart of the Force.   
  



End file.
